Quarantine Mini-Theory: Leap Years
Hello, my friends. I hope you are all well, staying safe, and taking the right measures to protect yourselves against COVID-19.
Because of this predicament, I’m sure you are asking yourselves where this virus came from. Obviously, it started in China, but you might probably be asking yourselves, “How exactly did it start?” As this subject is much too controversial, let me entertain you with a more of personal theory, rather than a full-blown conspiracy in these boring times.
If you read the title, you must be scratching your head about why leap years deserve their own theory. Think about it for a second. The current year is 2020. What is so special about this year? Not only is the world experiencing an unprecedented event in human history, which is happening on a leap year, but, if you really pay attention, leap years always seem to suck.
Yes, you read that right! Leap years are the worst years ever! If you don’t believe me, think about it real hard. In a mere four months, the world has faced one scare after another; although our most recent one is obviously worse than the others.
First, people were afraid of World War Three, and now this global pandemic is happening. You might be thinking, “Yeah, so what? Every year sucks anyways.” However, I’m referring to things on a global scale. Think back to 2016 and 2012, which were also leap years. What happened in 2012? You guessed it. Everyone thought the world was going to end, thereby resulting in collective suicides. “What about in 2016?”, you might ask? Well, 2016 had at least one terrorist attack somewhere in the world for every month. After all, that year started with the terrorist attack on Charlie Hebdo in Paris, right? If you still are not convinced, think back to the market crash in America in 2008, or to 2004, when Putin was re-elected president of Russia, or even to 1999, where the idea of the year 2000 (a leap year) terrified many.
There you have it! Leap years suck. It is too much of a pattern for it to be simply coincidence! I now suspect that Asian civilizations may have been on to something when calling the number four bad luck. Not to say that I believe in all of that mumbo-jumbo, but rather that they saw the leap year pattern and took it to the next level.
It is also a notorious superstition in Greece that leap years are bad luck; anything good and important that happens to a person in that year, like a wedding or a relationship, usually ends up in shambles.
That is all for today’s truth, my friends. Despite this depressing theory, do not be afraid, as there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Also, keep in mind that this is all mere superstition and speculation (or is it?). All jokes aside, stay indoors, and wash your hands often. Remember, if you do not hear from me again, you know what has happened, and what is yet to come.
By “V”
